19
May
11

“We got three big weeks ahead of us. It’s wedding season, kid!” *

Dear Dee,

We’ve hung out two nights throughout the course of our lives, and both times I’ve desperately wanted to make out with you. The ironic thing is the first time we met, about two years ago, we were making fun of a couple in our group who had just gotten together and their public make out scene was vomit-inducing, at best. Fast forward 24 months and possibly 24 first (shite) dates, and we were again thrown together at said couple’s wedding.

I forget the exact reasons I didn’t make a move the first time around, probably some combination of the following: I don’t operate that quickly, we were with some of your extended family, I’m kind of a p-word. This time around though, the reason was far clearer: I can’t play the rat race that happens at weddings. Sure, I’ve been to some where there are seventeen single females looking to make out, but this situation was entirely different. You were literally the only eligible female at the event (not entirely true, but the other two I’m thinking of are in that friend zone).

From the rehearsal dinner on Friday night onwards (my speech alone should’ve been enough for you to want to tear my clothes off…I kid, I kid), it was clear that I would be competing with approximately a dozen single men for your attention. Perhaps if I didn’t know anyone else at the wedding my mindset might have been different…but there were about 75 people I knew there, and a good chunk of them I actually wanted to see (this is exactly the opposite of what happens when I go to the bar most weekends). Maybe if I was guaranteed at least a boob grab or something I would’ve made more of a concerted effort. I guess I just don’t see the point of spending all night at a wedding with some cool people pining after one girl’s (even if she is cute & fun) attention.

Is that abnormal? That I’d rather spend times celebrating with my (pseudo) family & friends than shower you with affection? Is this a sign of a bigger problem. If so, I might be f*cked, and not in a good way.

Oh, out of curiosity, if I had approached you somewhat early on Saturday and said, “listen…I’m not going to join in the competition for you, but just know that I’d love to make out later on if you want to,” what would you have said?

See you in a couple years I hope,

Jeremy

*Wedding Crashers


4 Responses to ““We got three big weeks ahead of us. It’s wedding season, kid!” *”


  1. May 19, 2011 at 6:22 pm

    I’ve got to tell you, Jeremy, I would totally appreciate and respond to that line. Keep in mind, this is from the perspective of a 49 year old woman who, after a multi-year drought, has been involved for more than six months with two guys (one local, one long distance) and I’m having the time of my life. I hate b.s. games and I can’t be the only female who thinks that way. Would I have appreciated it at age 28? Don’t know.

  2. May 21, 2011 at 2:43 pm

    Never pass up a potential make out with someone who is awesome.

    You should’ve thrown that line out there!

  3. May 29, 2011 at 11:34 am

    Hah! This is hilarious! I just found your blog, and I love it. I agree with above comments, and, as a 25 year old single female, I would have greatly appreciated directness too!

    Glad to have found your blog, thanks for the laugh and best of luck,

    Larissa


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s


Letters sent…

May 2011
M T W T F S S
« Apr   Jun »
 1
2345678
9101112131415
16171819202122
23242526272829
3031  

What Era of Letters do you want to read?

DearExGirlfriend Tweets

Error: Twitter did not respond. Please wait a few minutes and refresh this page.

send a letter of your own (or just to say what’s up)

dearexgirlfriend at gmail

Join 102 other followers


Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 102 other followers